Raising the alarms

So what's new? Two weird events.

Alternating Fire Alarms

Yesterday, my mother's fire alarms went off twice - once at lunchtime, once at dinnertime. (Note the plural.) Yes, she had been cooking, but nothing got burnt. The fire alarms have never gone off before.

Upstairs alarm went off at noon, as I was getting up; downstairs one went off around 6:30pm. If these were related to the cooking, shouldn't the alarm closest to the kitchen go off both times? Why one upstairs, then one downstairs?

They were piercingly loud. While trying to shut one off, I discovered...(can you guess?)...they're not battery-operated: they're wired into the house. No failing batteries here. (See 'Fighting Fires' post, November 14.)


American Flag Drive-By

In between the two alarms, my mother and I went out. Driving home, around 5:30pm, a truck crossed our path, just before reaching my mother's street. It sported a large American flag (about 4'x6', maybe bigger) in a plastic sleeve on a black background - both seemed temporarily pasted on. The rest of this squarish, moving-type truck was blank and non-descript: no logos, no company name, nothing.

After crossing the four-way stop, I looked back and saw the truck's other side was bare.

Both incidents - the fire alarms and this flag-bearing truck - happened the day after I had posted to an activist listserv. I suggested that Canadian security bodies do monitor, infiltrate, and control community groups, listservs, and so on. Among links I included were two questioning the war in Iraq.

Strange timing, don't you think?


Note: Reading this blog, you may construe me as being anti-American, but that's not so. I just can't endorse many of the U.S.'s actions, and feel their present model of capitalism is questionable. At the Citizens' Inquiry into 9-11, I met some truly patriotic, well-informed Americans. Their love for their country and all it once stood for - freedom, democracy, truth, justice - shines through in the work each of them is doing to try and ensure a lawful and just society.

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Edit: The property managers insisted before that I must be *overloading* the circuits. Yet the only things on were my lights, fridge, and computer. They even tried to suggest my toaster oven uses substantial wattage.

Can electrical wiring problems suddenly creep up like this? Funny how I happen to be writing this weblog each time the fuse blows.

Same old heating problems, too. Entering my slightly cool apartment today, it was 68 degrees Fahrenheit (assuming the thermometer hasn't been tampered with), yet I noticed the manager's office was a cozy 74 degrees, as I handed over the rent cheque. They don't even live in the building.

Truth be damned

Just came across this story about Gary Webb, an award-winning American journalist and whistle-blower, who reported extensively on the CIA's involvement in Contra drug dealing in the U.S. Webb has apparently killed himself.

I don't know why people fail to question the never-ending 'death by suicide' of activists and truth-seekers - particularly well-known ones. Even if circumstances appear logical or understandable, there's a very real possibility of being helped along.

Read CounterPunch's story here (December 13, 2004).

Gary Webb's obituary by The Sacramento Bee (December 12, 2004).

Home adventure series

Wrote an entry about my heating and fusebox problems on December 6, but posted today.

Unless my apartment combusts, I probably won't be writing more about my household adventures. I'm starting to sound like either a whiner or a pesky tenant. However, I will add pictures later, so you can see how specific the incidents are. (Also see September 22 post, And three more...'.)

Equality mirage

Are 'gay rights' masking conservative agendas?

(See tail end of Questions about U.S. election.)

Prime Minister Paul Martin was steadfastly non-committal about same-sex marriage before taking up the Liberal Party leadership (mid-2003), and remained so leading up to the federal election (June 2004). Yet, he's now done a complete about-face, ever since President George Bush's official visit in November. Funny.

Compare news articles about Prime Minister Martin's stance on same-sex marriage before and after Bush's visit: PM Martin used to waffle endlessly, yet his new position is unusually clear and resolute.

See recent article: 'Cabinet minister ponders breaking ranks,' (Globe & Mail. December 15, 2004.)

Based on my possible surveillance, and hence, observing progressive events and listservs I participate in or endorse, I believe security bodies have been discovering benefits to embracing the queer population, and appearing to support LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender) progress. I've been suggesting this possibility for two years, due to certain incidents and strange encounters I've had with people. (Like in this post, only with people who are queer.)

Police Chief Julian Fantino's recent appearance on the cover of fab Magazine is a good example of what I mean by 'queer faddism'.

Believe it or not, I think some of the upswing in queer visibility is a way to get people's guards down: it helps promote goodwill, social ties, a celebratory sense of freedom, and mutual co-operation between Canada and the U.S. (academia, health, politics, tourism).

I question whether some of the increasing 'official' support for LGBT rights in Canada may contain hidden agendas. Here's why (kindly suspend your disbelief for two minutes...):

1. Making Canada appealing to Americans increases cross-border relations and can spur migration.

- There's always been a steady stream of U.S. citizens into Canada. Stepping this up would increase cultural integration and the U.S.'s political influence.* (See 'Fox news and free speech.')

2. Status quo within the country is getting shaken up and factions are forming, which can further destabilize national unity.

3. Promoting queer-friendly media and products means good business.

4. Homosexuality is also commonly associated with blatant sex, promiscuous lifestyles, etc - and sex sells.

5. Queer folks, usually men, are movers and shakers in many industries, including popular entertainment, arts, fashion, beauty, design, and so on. Again, big bucks and cultural fusion.

6. Changes are being brought about in U.S. and Canadian cities close to the border (eg, privatizing many public radio stations). Need I say it? Media is powerful.


America has been studying how to facilitate deep integration with Canada for many years - especially post-911 (see Council of Canadians). You may not believe me today, but I think close study of Toronto's activist and social scenes has helped elites devise creative new approaches to Canada-U.S. integration: WATCH FOR THE CONSERVATIVE UNDERTOW.


*Note: I'm all for a world without borders, but global politics are not so kind in actual reality.

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If we want a strong, free, independent Canada, responsible journalism, public awareness, grassroots empowerment, and upholding civil and privacy rights are key.

While I myself may have progressive values, I'm not necessarily anti-conservative: I hope we may all find peaceful co-existence through dialogue and holistic solutions.

Our neighbour's founding values are similar. The U.S. Constitution had partly been influenced by Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Franklin, and others' interest in the Iroquois confederacy and the Six Nation's Great Law of Peace (see 2nd paragraph).

Also see, 'The United States Constitution: Is it a Native American Myth?'

Gaining a sense of both America's history and its future direction - never mind talking about the Illuminati - makes National Treasure a compelling movie (see review and one viewer's comments). The film's casting, positioning and depiction of certain social groups, and clear emphasis on money (treasure) and materialism are intriguing. After all, money is power.

So getting back to Prime Minister Paul Martin's sudden interest in human rights and equality for LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender) people...

What's up with that?

Here's my take: Canada's elected representatives have been vested power by the people to serve this country and its citizens. But they're probably betraying this trust to enable the interests of a narrow few. No surprise there. But how is this is being done? And do you care enough about Canada's sovereignty and preserving democracy to speak out?

We are soon to be Can-Am flunkies, and all that entails.

Showtime!

Two words, folks: NATIONAL TREASURE. Check out this movie.

Film analysis would take too long, but get this: 'co-operatives' and 'maintaining the status quo' are both mentioned. (See December 12 post, 'Silence: boom or bust?')

If you can find ANY film in Hollywood's entire history that mentions co-operatives, I'll have you nominated into the Trivial Pursuit Hall of Fame.

I keep mentioning digital telephony and corporate monopolies as being key to information power, and how these companies likely have close ties to government security bodies. In National Treasure, they talk about the 'all-seeing eye,' cellphones are prominently featured, and the FBI are conveniently portrayed as bumblers, slow on the uptake.

PLEASE - pay attention to casting, social politics and positioning (ethnicity, gender, etc), and watch the film credits. Not just for this movie, but for any film made from 2003 onward.


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Internet and Digital Monopolies

To help avoid a Microsoft-type giant in Bell Sympatico (and Telus, Primus, etc), people need to support alternative internet service providers and vigorously ensure companies are NOT compromising consumer privacy (eg, selling customer database information, illegal wiretapping, individual profiling).

In September 2004, I started looking for a more reliable (read trustworthy) internet service provider. I finally found one called Echo Online. But too late: I dawdled for two months, then found out a company called WinTel has bought them out.[1]

Echo Online was established in 1996; yet, I bet this rapid takeover was initiated after the sales rep and I discussed privacy concerns. (See September 25 post, 'Websites and helicopters.')

Digital technology and information power, yesiree. Conspiracy theories? Maybe. See Financial Post article on Bell's entry into ISPs.

[1] Read 'Considering the "Private" Citizen,' and learn more about WinTel. [Added Feb. 17/05]

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More About Privacy Concerns:

See September 24 post, 'Miracles of telephony.'

About.com: Privacy in Canada.

Privacycilla.org

Discussion about Privacy Commissioner George Radwanski's resignation.

Editing more posts

Just edited December 4 post, 'Growing list of problems.'

Disturbing the peace

Wow, I have to laugh at myself.    :)   :0   :D

I have a real knack for inviting suspicions and judgement. No, I wasn't threatened with 'investigation' because of financial wrongdoing. It had to do with my passport.

Due to my own miscommunication and odd behaviour, and having had lived in Asia for an extended time, the government thought I might be part of a passport ring.

Ironically, I never associated with shady characters while abroad; but my travels in developing countries were sometimes intense and survival-oriented (pics to come).

I came back to Toronto somewhat shell-shocked, and much changed. Spiritual malaise and confusion turned to depression; then, anger. Being back was tough. People talk about reverse culture-shock, but you have no idea, until you've experienced it.

Also, Toronto may be one of the most multicultural cities in the world, but I find people are quick to pigeon-hole or dismiss each other, and tend to be closed-off. As with any large city. Also, despite being born and raised in Toronto (an issue that's oddly highlighted in the movie, National Treasure), I often experience prejudice and subtle racism - even in the most progressive of circles. So call me sensitive.

Gradually, my inner hell became an outer one. Feeling negatively judged by both native Canadians and newcomers, alike, and not having much social support, I became more political and outspoken. What a bonus I've been to the authorities!

Over five years of monitoring, and three years of being relentlessly surveilled and perniciously harassed - while unemployed, emotionally unwell, and often isolated - has been terrifying, at times. I've also worried about others, and certain people have died. I now believe emboldened conservative entities are drastically increasing infiltration into progressive milieus and spying on the general public, with the help of U.S. funding.

Do I have tangible proof of this? No.

Maybe if I had a job, social standing, resources, connections, and could rely on the integrity of average citizens, law enforcement, and so on, it'd be a different story.

All I can say is, I've gained a better understanding of war, brutality, intelligence operations, mind control, and punishment of the human psyche.

Yes, my own personal chaos helped escalate things to their present state. I was, and still am, deeply hurting. Coming under surveillance and harassment hasn't been a picnic, either. Yet no one ever believed in either my pain or my circumstances.

So, is it my fault that conservative forces have totally benefitted from my surveillance and oppression? Intelligence agencies, in collusion with corporations, love power and information: they want new ways to Divide and Conquer. This doesn't bode well for the country or fellow citizens.

Many stories of abuse by authorities exist - sometimes horrifying ones. Yet I believe this situation goes beyond a few institutions harassing innocent citizens.* But you'll have to judge for yourself.


*Note: Terrorizing is the word I'd like to use, but so much of what I'm saying is yet unproven.

[Edit: For a fairly realistic look at how surveillance methods have advanced, see Runaway Jury and National Treasure. (More discussion to come.)]

Silence: boom or bust?

I've said before why I talk about economics so much. Here's a more comprehensive analysis:

PART 1: Daily Realities
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Being mostly unemployed for over five years, gives me plenty of time to ruminate about economic challenges. I now realize how critical economics is. (Call me a fool, but I used to be justice-oriented without understanding ‘the bottom line.’)

Now, I analyze economic aspects so much that people figure I'm financially savvy (or rich, greedy, materialistic, a successful capitalist, etc). Unfortunately, not. I may even post my bank statements, so you can share the joke...ar, ar....

Being hyper-focused on both economics and surveillance, I spend much of my time researching ways to counteract the government's pervasive and illegal electronic surveillance and threatening tactics. When I used to have privacy and wasn't being threatened, I was interested in other things - like astrology, alternative health, co-operatives, holistic learning, psychology, polyamory, spirituality, and so on.

Harassment has also made me corruption-focused. I gained a better understanding of Big Brother and various forms of both corruption and control during my travels. Now I see these things everywhere. (Folk singer Bruce Cockburn, Canada's lyrical sage, sings powerfully about some of these issues.)

Note: I had also given my weblog link to my therapist, who charges on a sliding scale. Hence, my compulsive explanations on here about any spending I may do. I'm definitely in debt, and YES, my family and I ARE being threatened.


PART 2: Broader Picture
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Being *holistic* is trendy nowadays, but I've always been this way. I tend to appreciate aboriginal approaches and worldviews (see below).

I now see that economics and the exchange of goods are an intrinsic part of human nature and have existed throughout history. Trading often paved the way to cross-cultural interactions and new discoveries.

Yet, as an Arts major and an average Canadian, I was pretty uninformed about the actual workings of economics. It bored me to tears. So I'd often be pro-social and environmental justice, without really understanding the economic framework.

Living in Asia, I gained a better understanding of this huge topic, in various ways. Like by teaching English to working-class kids, then working in publications for a large company, as well as for other organizations, then later, backpacking off the beaten path in developing countries. Economic realities and their impacts are in your face: globalization isn't just a theory or concept.

Interning with an international co-operative organization deepened my awareness of grassroots economics. I believe it's one of the things the government found intriguing about me. (See December 15 post, 'Showtime!')

So, now, I realize: economics is fundamental to strong nation-building, environmental sustainability, and to most social transformation.



PART 3: Beyond Silence
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I think our polite avoidance in discussing economic realities has indirectly contributed to growing socio-economic disparity, and to Canada's present vulnerability to the United States. People learn by sharing information and skills.

Communication gaps have weakened Canada's cultural fabric. For example, older generations of Canadians often have sound and frugal ways of living - especially those who'd been affected by the 1930s Depression - yet that knowledge isn’t being carried forward. (More about Canada’s Great Depression.)

Being a reticent nation, most cultural wisdom gets passed on through first-hand experience, rather than being spoken about. Yet this wisdom and a sense of stewardship aren't reaching younger generations. (Margaret Laurence's poignant novels capture this aspect of Canada's character well.)

The bigger problem is the government's lack of accountability and vision. Poor leadership, competing economic forces, and a changing social landscape are quickly leading Canada onto the American altar to be sacrificed into a colonial state.

Paul Wells, writing in Maclean's, satirically suggests that 'Canadians must elect the next president of the United States.' Why? Among other things, Wells says it would 'bring an end to the tiresome, endless debate over whether Canada's government is a puppet of American interests. At last, we'd know' ('"We" Should Pick the Prez.' Maclean's. Nov 8. 2004: 64).

Personally, I think we're already there.


Silence may be golden, but I often find it difficult and disempowering to just be quiet. I believe Canada is likewise suffering from its own silences. Chief among these is mainstream media's complicity with corporate agendas in excluding key information and keeping important truths out of public knowledge.


Note: René Descartes - the founder of modern-day rationalism, which has long pooh-poohed illogical or intangible aspects of human experience - was extremely holistic. Descartes was interested in spirituality and metaphysics, yet those writings were suppressed, due to the Church's all-powerful presence.

Bush and Martin: sealing the deal

So President Bush has been and gone, and now Canada is getting in deeper.

Check out NOW Magazine's article, 'To send or not to send,' (December 9-16, 2004).

Prime Minister Martin wants Canada to financially support and supervise Iraqi elections, while U.S. troops remain in Iraq and are backing certain candidates. So much for democracy.

Remember that pesky oil issue, which U.S. government and media, alike, deny as being a reason for attacking both Afghanistan and Iraq? Tony Clarke of the Polaris Institue comments in NOW:

"The fact that we are the number-one foreign oil supplier to the U.S. now, having surpassed Saudi Arabia, raises serious questions as to our role in fuelling the military machine of the United States."

Other Questions

1) Who is America to supervise democratic development in Iraq? Free enterprise, maybe, but fair elections? (See 'Questions about U.S. election.')

2) Why is there no discussion about how unreliable the U.S.' own balloting system is - ranked, I believe, even lower than Argentina and many other countries. (See 'Voting issues, no news coverage.')

3) What if U.S. companies start supplying Iraq's electoral equipment and systems? The implications of this go far beyond war profiteering and other economic gains.


To paraphrase Stephen Streeter's comment in NOW Magazine:
we are backing the U.S.'s actions - not the United Nations' - and this sets a very dangerous precedent.

Shouldering the burden

Notice how they never use the 'L' word to refer to U.S. Vice-President Dick Cheney's openly queer daughter, Mary Cheney? The less stigmatizing word is 'gay.'

Going through the wringer with surveillance - and watching the way industry and state in Canada are becoming bed buddies, with U.S. and Canada strengthening ties faster than one can say, 'Bye-bye sovereignty' - I've learned tough lessons.

My heart goes out to African-Caribbean Canadians - especially any queer women and men from that community. For these people, there's little escape or shelter from tyranny. In this difficult game of politics and pecking orders, plus growing right-wing fundamentalism in North America, strong, intelligent African-Caribbean women activists are probably most vulnerable. Systems created by a few disempowers many, right from the start.

In the past few months, several African-Caribbean women I know have written to me at odd times, with strange knowing comments. When I responded, they never wrote back. I've also been receiving weird email bounces from certain people*, and my posts to a listserv haven't been going through. Very odd.

(Read about Sustainable Africa Newsletter spam and other hijinx. Other examples to come.)

To these incredible women, who are possibly being co-opted by intelligence agencies (CSIS, etc), and may have little choice but to co-operate, I apologize. They may be telling you what an idiot I've been, but I was in deep pain, and felt shafted by all sides. I'm sorry if they may be interfering with you.

*Note: About email bounces, yes, some people may be blocking emails, but not those in question. Also, in trying to change internet service providers and explore privacy measures, I've had bounced emails and unanswered messages all week. More info to come.

Many truths

I've gotta take a break and reflect more. Being fair and accurate, in spite of harassment and other realities, is hard. Connecting my experiences to conservative entities and their agendas is even harder.

Hastiness and my own personal baggage can distort things. For example:

In my post about Jack ('The power of language'), I almost make him sound like a boy scout. Yet he spoke of being a drug dealer in Calgary. He also had stacks of 'progressive' books - many involving race politics, or titles by well-known feminists and thinkers like Margaret Atwood - but his attitudes were conservative. Much like security bodies are (ie, sexist, anti-queer, etc). He also referred to Muslim people as 'Infidels.'

Describing his quick exit from a Calgary hang-out before police supposedly busted the place, Jack said he wasn't worried about leaving fingerprints behind. His proposed alibi: 'So, I fucked a chick. Big deal.'

He told me he was teaching English to a Japanese girl named, Akiko, but that 'she stopped coming.' His comments: 'She didn't want to pay - but she didn't want to have sex, either. I didn't think that was a very fair exchange.'

Jack told me several times, 'I'd have sex with you,' like he'd be doing me a favour. But, while my self-esteem was and has been pretty low, I wasn't interested.

Someone once said: 'racism gets sexualized, and sexism gets racialized.' I agree. But I also know I've done it to others. Power relations around sex are pretty darn complicated, and seldom equal.

Visiting Jack's rooming house - second level of a commercial building, where about 12 other down-and-out men also room - playing Scrabble, and listening to music wasn't exactly relaxing. (Went there about four or five times in a six-month period.)

There were many STRANGE MOMENTS, like him telling me an old guy had died in the shared bathroom on a previous night. Also, his claiming to be an orphan, yet suddenly 'discovering' his mother is dying, so he has to go out of town to visit her. These comments seemed geared towards frightening me, rather than being actual truths. Hard to convey, so I'll stick to basics.

Jack's musical tastes lean towards extremely hardcore heavy metal - or whatever the term is these days. Some almost bordered on satanic cult-type spins. It wasn't all harsh: he also introduced me to David Gray and Buty.

That was 2001. He said he'd lived in Czechoslovakia for nearly five years before, just as I had lived in Asia for a similar time period. He often emphasized seeming commonalities between us, and how we're both, 'Alone - so alone.'

I drank tea from one of his mugs once. As I was leaving, he pounced on it like it was a blood sample. Some of his parting comments were also disturbing, like, 'Hope you get home safe,' but in a really sinister tone.

NOW Magazine article describes how trash may be snooped by authorities. For a time, based on Jack's comments and behaviours, plus other incidents, fugitive me was petrified about throwing out anything with saliva, fingerprints, or bodily fluids on it - even hair. But I've given up. (I plan to do worm composting eventually, but that day has not yet come.)

Ever since I first met him, Jack was keen to show me his portfolio and resume. I eventually showed him my resume, as well, but without the contact info. He scanned it intensely, line by line, for several minutes. I finally walked over, and he said, 'I'm only halfway through.' It was unnerving, so I took it back.

Jack said many things that conveyed detailed knowledge of me, my habits, my activities and conversations.

I appreciated the companionship - though intimidating - and the intellectual stimulation. Jack's interesting and intelligent, and I was very isolated. Yet, I mainly kept in touch to find out how he was connected to my surveillance.

Note: I did not give or accept favours. I treated Jack to a meal once, as he seemed really hard up. We were both unemployed and struggling, supposedly (see below). I feel awkward and self-conscious, if people give me things, or pay for me.

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Notes to above:


A) I can empathize with people who hold different views - including ultra-conservatives. For example, Bush's argument for a 'security perimeter' around North America makes sense on the face of it. However, I question WHAT the agenda is behind these actions, WHY, and HOW?

If the U.S. government engineered the 9-11 tragedy, this would be an incredible crime against humanity, and an immense betrayal of the American people. Not farfetched, all things considered. The fact is: 'War Against Terrorism' serves major corporate and oil interests.

Last Saturday, I saw Clear and Present Danger on TV, starring Harrison Ford. Guess what, folks: art often imitates reality.

(Just to clarify my claims of being 'isolated,' and also not being a TV-watcher... Yes, I'm watching more TV at my mother's than ever before. Even visits to my mother's have increased. In five years, the first time I stayed over was last December.)

Speaking of movies, saw this on Being Jennifer Garrett: The Top 100 Overlooked Films of the 1990s. Jennifer Garrett rocks.


B) Infiltrating and influencing progressive and/or ethnic communities has drastically improved. I keep claiming 'secret agents' and 'plants' are everywhere. Why? I believe the government has benefitted from my unusual experiences, and are recruiting widely:

i) I'm critical about people's authenticity. Yet, I myself am often not believed, due to my own emotional instability and nervousness, or reasons of race - often both.

ii) Who could they get past me? Well, it started with this guy, pretending to be queer and interested in a community food programme. I went from wary to super-friendly in two secs.

iii) Security bodies study all alternative people, venues, listservs, and so on. Observing my contentious interactions with people for several years provides rich learning about social dynamics. Manipulating the masses - especially progressives - is very useful.

iv) Working in hospitality through personnel agencies. Having worked at both large and upscale places, intelligence agencies quickly saw that hospitality workers are a fertile group for mass recruitment of moles. People will do anything for an extra buck. For $8/hour (no tips), people will spy on others, and even put up with harsh treatment. I've met some pretty desperate crowds. Recruiting ordinary people en masse is powerful - it's like a civilian army.

v) If economic incentives don't work, throw in some ego stroking, or conversely, intimidation and possible blackmail, and people are quickly at the government's beck and call.


C) Activists are few. Many get burned out, with no compensation or acknowledgement for their efforts and suffering.

Here's the problem: that person you thought is a fellow volunteer or activist is possibly being paid. They may 'talk the talk' or even be long-time community members, but you don't know if they have security ties, or inside connections. Examples to come.

Bottom line: it's an uphill battle for truth-seekers and whistle-blowers.


D) Big Brother's power is growing rapidly. Hello Blackberries, hidden cameras, internet data mining, and digital monopolies. (More info to come.)

The government has been studying activism in Toronto closely. You may consider yourself to be aware and intelligent, but they are deftly deceiving genuine progressives on a broad scale.

Liberal-minded folks have so much working against them: lack of cohesion is a key challenge. Conservatives co-operate because their goals are control and greed. Liberals disperse and are easily divided because their goals are freedom, democracy, and equality. Go figure.

Making ties: home front

Here's what's happening on the homefront:

No heat today. Thermometer reads 65 degrees Fahrenheit, 43 humidity. (Legal standards are 70F and 40 humidity.)

Had far colder days (eg, 60F last week, and as low as 45F / 7C in past winters - or whatever temperature one can blow steam at), but the point here is:

1) I've had NO daytime heating, Monday to Friday, sometimes weekends and several nights, since October 26 - six weeks. They say it's due to 'maintenance.'

2) I now seem to be the only tenant thus affected (unlike two Christmases ago, when someone posted a note on the front door: 'TURN ON THE HEAT!!').

3) My alternate sources of heat - oven and an area heater - both developed sudden problems. (details below)

4) Be interesting to see how my electricity usage rises - though nothing can compare to last winter.

5) Landlord hasn't tried to resolve my heating problems. They say the 'boiler's working beautifully.'

6) After several attempts to clarify this matter, I said a letter might be best, and would send a copy to the City, though I don't expect much support from them. My landlord suppressed a laugh and smiled. Conveniently, there's only one building inspector for the area.


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Heating and Other Problems


Here's one convoluted example of how things seem to connect...

I had no heat most of last week. Then, the day after I'm suddenly encouraged to leave an anger therapy program, the fuse in my apartment blows. (My therapist's reason: lack of progress. Yet I'm far more congenial and less reactive than before, and I've made strides. See this list - #9 definitely applies to my case.)

So I'm sitting in my apartment with no heat, and only one working outlet (the stove).

I put in two new fuses, but they immediately blow again. I try calling the property managers several times. Finally, one answers: nothing can be done till tomorrow.

8:00pm - I leave for a few hours and come back later that night. Temperature has dropped to 60 degrees Fahrenheit, 46 humidity. I, then, notice the oven's heat isn't as strong as before.

So no heat, no working outlets (except stove), and my one alternative heat source is conking out.

Landlord comes the next day.[1] He seems baffled about what to do, and makes three visits that day. Second time, he comes back with a 'certified electrician' (he mentions this several times) and also hands me a mail package. It's the Zippy Recorder I'd just ordered to help document my problems. (Bought in Canada, and I suspect the government's been in touch with the seller.[2])

I won't even begin to tell you how unlikely (impossible?) it is for my landlord to have received mail on my behalf.[3]

In the span of 24 hours, both landlords (property managers) are suddenly stressing their lack of electrical expertise. Over the phone, one says, 'I'm afraid if it's electrical, I can't be of much help.' When the other one comes to my place, he stares at the fusebox from a distance for several minutes, and asks questions, like he doesn't know how to fix it. Then, he brings in a certified electrician to deal with a blown fuse. Yet, under previous management, both these guys had been doing most of the maintenance work.

(See November 15 post, 'More anomalies for mother.')

Landlord says I've overloaded the outlets (not). Then, both he and the electrician suggest I plug my appliances into the stove-top outlet. He stresses that it's a 'more powerful' electrical source. How so? And, funny, I just discovered the night before the oven's bottom heating element is no longer working; it's less powerful, now.

I suspect the new Zippy Recorder handed to me by my landlord won't work properly. I'm correct: sound is seriously distorted. I have to return it.

Household adventures to be continued...

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Footnotes:

[1] If you're thinking my landlord is responsive, this was my fourth complete day and night without heat.

[2] Am having real difficulties getting the Zippy Recorder replaced...

[3] Here's why my landlord couldn't have received my mail:

a) I was home all day, both today and yesterday (ordered item November 24, it arrived November 26).

b) Canada Post should leave a notice, if I was unreachable.

c) Time of day my landlord gave me the package doesn't coincide with mail delivery times, yet he acted like the postman just handed it to him.

4) My landlord doesn't live in the building; he's never received mail on my or anyone else's behalf.


[Edit: Fuse blows again on December 14, so I have a return visit by the landlords (oops, I mean property managers). They're still claiming I've overloaded the outlets. Yet nothing was on, except...my computer. Hmm, weird. Can fuses blow three times in two weeks? This suggests wiring problems, but something like this doesn't just suddenly pop up.]

Making ties: national front

Seen the TV news ad for 'Canada and the New U.S. Empire' yet? Impressive.

Many signs indicate the 'new U.S. empire' isn't just about the U.S., or Canada's evolving position, or even ties to Europe. Serious things are afoot. To better understand world events, it may help to remember that money and power move horizontally, not vertically.

Often when the U.S. pushes its agenda on Canada, the Canadian dollar goes up. Could this be a distraction?

I once read somewhere that world currencies are actually controlled by a few key parties. Some spiritualists (wacky truth-seekers) have actually discovered incredible connections between space research, natural phenomenon, historical wonders, global politics, and so on. I attended a few 'New Age' seminars and was blown away. (I don't get the math, science, or logic parts, but the social trends and intuitive stuff make sense to me.)

See Mark Lombardi's political artwork.

Read Flower of Life research (see Articles).

What is Flower of Life?

Other links about sacred geometry. Here's an interesting one.

More about Drunvalo Melchizedek. (scroll down)

Growing list of problems

My mother's front door lock developed problems today, after we came home. It was installed two years ago.

I happened to ask my mother recently about the front door lock. The moment I did, I immediately regretted it.

So guess what? The following day, a guy named Jay Joseph from Bhattika Securities comes by to enquire about the home's security system (or lack of).

Considering I immediately thought some new *incident* would happen, relating to the front door, and given factors below, I hope you can understand my suspicion towards security salesman Jay Joseph.

I also don't wish to feed stereotypes or prejudices, but if a young African-Caribbean man comes to your door, as dusk is setting, and continues to ask about your home security, when you're clearly not interested, this seems unusual and contrived to me. (see below)

Note: I have many well-timed incidents or encounters, like this one, and often anticipate them.

Jay Joseph was persistent, and kept focusing on potential threats and safety factors. My mother didn't think anything. But he wouldn't leave, and did not seem intent on selling anything; he merely emphasized possible dangers. (see below)

He claimed it was his second day on the job, yet he also pointed out the security sticker on my mother's window. If he was new on the job, and quite young (I'd say under 21), is it likely he'd bother approaching a house that already appears to have a security system in place, sticker and all? (My mother had discontinued the service.) His complete disregard for overstaying one's welcome was also strange: pitching home security systems isn't like selling chocolate-covered almonds, or recruiting converts to a religious group.

This sales visit came the day before Hallowe'en, and ten days before the first year anniversary of my Uncle Joseph's death (see November 2003). Other odd things happened this same weekend, but I didn't bother to write about them.

Two nights before this , I had phoned a friend and left a message, saying my recollections from the previous year were stressing me out. I specifically mentioned my Uncle Joseph's death and how my landlord installed a new fire alarm on Hallowe'en. Two weeks later, my fire alarm goes beserk the evening I return from my mother's. I'm not saying all this is connected, just offering contextual information.


Here's a summary:


1. Thursday: Stressed phone message to friend mentioning Uncle Joseph, Halloween, and fire alarm.

2. Friday: I happen to ask my mom about the front door.

3. Saturday: Very young salesperson comes to the door, trying to sell home security systems; his last name is Joseph; he's very persistent, but only focuses on threats and danger, not selling.

4. Two weeks later: I come home from my mother's, my fire alarm develops sudden problems and has to be removed.

5. Five weeks later: My mom's front door lock isn't working properly, though it's fairly new. She has to fix it, using a screwdriver.


Here's another example of timing:

Once, when harassment was intense, a supposed life insurance salesperson called me. They kept listing all the different ways I might come to harm - a long list. I felt it was an unusual sales approach, especially coming from an unknown caller.

(If I didn't actually have some messages posted (see sidebar), plus three more cassette tapes to come, people would tell me I'm 'imagining things,' am 'paranoid,' or 'delusional.')

I'll be putting up a web page listing all the problems or anomalies that happen to my mother, and any comments I made or actions I did beforehand. You'll be amazed.


[Edit: My mother didn't think anything then. But she's been nervous about how secure the house is ever since. Not because of the salesperson, but because of my attitude that day, and persistent problems over the past five weeks. Eg, front door lock, banging noises from heating duct, phone calls, stereo starts up almost on cue, TV cable became disconnected by itself, bird suddenly under the weather after she said how well he's doing, AND SO ON...]

Thoughts on Canada and self

Nice to have my perspectives corroborated by other sources, considering my low credibility. Here's an excerpt from Maclean's interview with long-time journalist and former resident columnist, Peter C. Newman:

[Interviewer is Maclean's Editor Anthony Wilson-Smith]

You've known both Paul Martin senior and junior well. How is the son doing?

...[Paul Martin Jr.] acts too much like a puppet, fast on both feet, trying to jump out of the way of the next crisis before it overwhelms him, by giving the store away. That's not the way to lead a country. There are days when he makes Jean Chretien look good, and that is a terrible condemnation. Chretien may have been a thug, but at least we knew who was running the country." ('Going Strong.' Maclean's Nov 8. 2004: 28.)

Yes, Prime Minister Martin seems to be 'giving the store away' and likely knows it. Just as former prime minister Brian Mulroney did, when he signed the free trade deal. It reaped him many personal gains, and an important place in history.

Isn't Martin the successful owner of a large shipping line? Didn't he also choose not to fly the Canadian flag, in order to avoid paying taxes? (See PaulMartinTime.ca and FlyOurFlag.ca)

Like Newman, I had expressed similar appreciation for former prime minister Jean Chrétien, in retrospect: Chrétien at least stood his ground with U.S. President George W. Bush.

I can't help but feel that blind, entrenched party loyalty, and this 'lesser of two evils' approach to politics and electing representatives, are slowly killing democracy. It's like the environmental situation: people may only be moved to consciousness and action when things get really, REEEALLY BAD. By then, it may be too late.

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Self and National Identity

My original post was a rambling mess. Revised version to come...

Unwrapping the box

Surveillance is complicated. My obsession with details may seem trivial or narcissistic, but these flights of self-absorption are necessary for pointing out the bigger picture.


Don't Box Me In

Unless you know who or how I am as a person, this crazy situation won't make sense. So let's get a few things straight.


1) Freedom is important to me.

I can't sum up nearly five years of therapy, and tell you why I've been so erratic, crazy, confused, and neurotic - I just have. When I began to realize how pervasive my surveillance is, no one would believe me, and I had little emotional support or credibility. I became frantic, like Harrison Ford in The Fugitive. While no crime had been committed, I desperately wanted to preserve both my freedom and my privacy. My efforts have been typically headstrong and foolish - yet, I now know it's been a futile endeavour.

(Did you know The Fugitive is loosely based on a true story?)


2) I'm not a computer geek. Addict, sometimes; techno-head, not.

I've learned quite a bit about the internet over the past three years, but I'm NOT technically oriented. I'm trying to convey conceptually what's going on, and also share any helpful learning, because this is important shit.


3) Being contradictory is how I am.

I have disparate interests and can be very extreme. Add a good dose of emotional turmoil, and you may see why I believe my surveillers have learned lots merely by observing my behaviour and other people's reactions to me.


4) I don't claim to be a good writer.

I'm long-winded and pedantic, and can barely recall learning any grammar at school. I've also got personal challenges, like stress, ADD, past head injury, ongoing threats, and so on. Being coherent is hard enough. Please don't expect me to be concise and entertaining, as well.


More about cyber stuff:

My weird email problems have been ongoing for several years. Someone recommended I use ZoneAlarm's free firewall. That's how I was able to record some signs that my computer was being 'hacked.' ZoneAlarm is considered one of the best firewalls around, yet whoever's been hacking me was able to get past it easily. (Good definition of firewall.)

I disconnected my internet service for two years, mostly due to hacking, but unemployment was also a factor. Just signed up again in May of this year. (I'd been easing off medication, and started getting more actively involved in community things.) I still use cybercafes on occasion for various reasons (eg, computer down, privacy concerns, etc).


More new household adventures to share. Stay tuned.